Where do I start
I can’t even begin
Yours was the heart
I couldn’t seem to win
The days have gone by
The seasons have all changed
I’m still asking why
It couldn’t be arranged
I gave it my all
In everything we did
I took the fall
While your heart was hid
I tried every angle
No matter what bait I dangled
Your heart couldn’t be broached.
|My Own Little World
Every minute of every day
The thoughts are in my head, I can’t get away.
It started long ago when my mind began to slip,
No matter what I do I just can’t get a grip.
Reality eludes me, life is better in my head
If it weren’t for that I’d probably be dead.
The life I see around me causes nothing but pain
But I can always escape into my own brain.
The land that I like best is the one where I’m alone.
If I do want company, I’ll pick up the phone.
The phone is out of service, but that’s ok so am I.
I no longer bother to ask myself why.
I’ve come to accept it even though it may sound wrong
But who cares anymore my mind is completely gone.
Whether this program is not for you or if you take it to heart
We all still have to do our own little part
If we can’t get it together we all will pay the price
It’s up to us all whether we can move on with our lives.
This family is falling apart, it’s a big mess,
So I jumped right in and did what I thought was best.
I see that what I did made things far worse,
So I have something to say, but I’ll apologize first.
I’m sorry I came off so strong out the gate,
From here on out I’ll give a verbal then wait.
If the behavior doesn’t stop or happens again,
Then an encounter slip will go in.
If that doesn’t help the behavior to stop,
I’ve exhausted my other options so a pull-up will be dropped.
If it comes to that, don’t worry one bit,
If you get a LE I’ll help you with it.
I know we’ve never met
But there’s something I have to say
You would win a bet
If you thought I’ve never loved anyone this way.
I’m not sure how it happened,
Or exactly what you did.
All I know is you’re a godsend,
And until you my heart was hid.
Now that I know you,
One thing is for sure,
Whenever I’m blue,
You are the cure.
|When We Finally Meet
Less than four months and I will be home,
And won’t have to talk to you just over the phone.
My arms won’t be empty, my lips won’t be dry,
And pictures won’t be the only way that you’re in my eyes.
When we finally meet, the first time we touch,
I’m almost afraid it will be too much.
That my heart might explode into a million bits.
You are the only one who’s ever loved me this much,
So I can’t wait to let out the clutch.
Storm-clouds sweep across the sky,
While I sit and think about my life.
I’ve done so much, I’ve come so far
I’ve wasted too much time in bars.
I still have a chance to turn it around
To get my head out of the clouds and my feet on the ground.
You are that chance, and I want you to know
That I’m going to take this as far as it will go.
I have to ask, but only one time,
For the rest of my life, will you be mine?
No matter what happens, whether we’re together or apart,
I want to be assured that you’ll take care of my heart.
Times may get tough and money may be thin,
But I know in my heart that love will always win.
So please answer my question and answer it true,
If you think we can make it just say “I DO”.
|Who I Am
A dark cloud rests upon my soul,
My mind is trapped, no place to go.
The saddest song plays in my ears,
As I try my best to fight back tears.
Fight all I can some always fall.
The world is against me and my back is against the wall.
I wish I could end it, make it all stop.
In this life I’ll never be on top.
It’s what I live with, put up with every day.
That’s why I am who I am and push others away.
As I look at the road ahead and the traveling left to do,
Until I’m finally dead, I want to travel it with you.
Of all the things I’ve done and the choices that I’ve made.
I’ve had a lot of fun, but now the debts must be paid.
When I’m finally out of this place and get my feet on the ground,
I can only hope I’ll see your face every time I turn around.
I’ve become all of the things I never wanted to be
I’m looking back over my life and wondering what happened to me.
There is no one point where everything went wrong,
I just took too many detours while I was traveling along.
To straighten my life out there’s a lot of work to do,
But it should be easy compared to the hell I’ve put myself through
No better time than now, no better place than here.
I had better get started before I waste another year.
I haven’t been around as much as I should,
Nor have I been the man that I know I could.
My time is growing short I’ll soon be free.
You are the only one that I want beside me,
To help me keep straight and out of jail,
To open up my heart and let it set sail.
When I get home in October I just want to say,
I want you to be the one I come home to every day.
With all the tears I’ve cried and the ways that I’ve been hurt
I’m surprised every day that I’m not covered with dirt.
I want to speed things up with every passing day,
But I know that if I do I’d be taking the cowards way.
I’m not much of a man, but I am better than that,
At least I like to think so when I hang up my hat.
I’m moving through one step at a time
Just biding the days until you are mine.
Holding my breath, hoping all will go well,
And that I’ll no longer be in this hell.
I dream of you every night,
But I lose you when I turn on the light.
I want to cry, but I have to be strong,
Because I know that I’ll hold you before too long.
In order to forgive myself I have to admit what I did wrong,
Then I have to come to terms with the guilt I’ve felt all along.
I know what I did wrong and exactly my part.
I associated my house directly to my heart
I need to learn to love others instead of just things,
If I ever want my heart to be able to take wing.
I have to remember that I’m good even though I make mistakes.
In order to be healthy I’m willing to do whatever it takes.
Trapped and alone and it’s all my own fault.
My conscience didn’t slow me or make me halt.
I lost everything I loved or ever had.
Where I’m at I can’t be a dad.
Behind these fences all I can do,
Is write these poems and think of you,
And about the future that we can live,
If I can have another chance and you can give,
Me the time to prove that I’ve changed,
And all my priorities have been rearranged.
So is it possible, can I have another chance,
Just one more try, one more dance?
You are the woman that I love and have since the start.
The only person on earth with the keys to my heart.
So unlock the door, and let yourself in,
Prove that true love does always win.
As the sun moves down the western sky
My body is tired and my mouth is dry.
I got myself here and I can’t get away,
At least not until they finally say.
Your number is up, that’s the end of this bit.
Get your ass home we’re tired of it.
If home is where the heart is I have to go to you.
Never before in my life have I found a love that’s true.
I’m so close I can almost taste the outside.
The day I got locked up a part of me died.
There is only one reason that I’ve made it through.
The one reason, the only reason is you.
The thought of your skin so soft and tan.
The smell of your hair makes me glad I’m a man.
When I look in your eyes I almost drown.
When I think of your beauty nothing gets me down.
I’m counting the days until I am free.
When I can again hold you close to me.
|What I Want
Another day closer, another one down.
Soon my feet will be on the ground.
Starting all over, making a new life.
Doing what I can to find myself a wife.
A woman who will love me and hold me close.
Even when I don’t tell her, she knows,
That I love her and always will.
No matter what happens I’ll help her climb that hill
When the time comes that we both are set,
We’ll have some kids, but don’t worry about that yet.